Life Lessons: When it Hurts

Lately, a lot has been on my mind. I took a break because I was tired of the political post. And the fighting and all that other stuff. And I was looking at the words people were saying and thinking about things going on in my own life. And there’s pain everywhere. I keep asking myself why do we hurt? Heartbreak, loneliness, loss, and just because we’re angry. Anger if you ask me is just at times placing the hurt on someone else. Because you want to hide your feelings.

I used to do that all the time. When I was hurting I’d bottle it up. Bury it. I didn’t want anyone to see how vulnerable I was. How much I was suffering. I remember the first real heart break I had. It was painful. Did you know that emotional pain like that actually becomes physical? You can take pain killers to help. However, I don’t suggest that. You see. People sometimes look at life and think I don’t ever want to be hurt. Saying things like ” I don’t want to be with them because they’re going to hurt me.” or “I keep myself closed out because someone may hurt me.” or one the more interesting ones they act in such a fashion they push people away. Because they don’t want that pain.

Though, let’s be honest. Living and being with people. Just the fact of having any kind of relationship means you will some day be hurt. Maybe a little or maybe a lot. It is going cause you pain, it is going to make feel something deep in your heart. You can ignore it or pretend it doesn’t. But it will still be there. That pain is real. And you can’t hide from it. If left unchecked it will tear you apart. It will begin to make your life a living hell. Because getting hurt does damage us. And once the damage is done. You have to decide what to do next.

I keep thinking about this for some odd reason. I think about the times that hurt the worst for me. The times I did the right thing to fix it and the times I made a mess of it. When you do get hurt you can choose to forgive the person. If it someone you love, you may still be worried that it may happen again. But isn’t that part of life? Especially in romance. You are being vulnerable with someone. You are at risk for being hurt. But you have to decide for yourself what to do next. People are flawed. They make mistakes. And it can be okay or it can’t. You have to learn to deal with it and either move forward. Or just stay there.

Yet, staying there isn’t the answer. Trust me. When you stay in the pain or that hurt someone close to you created. You being the journey into darkness. You bring yourself down.  You potentially can hurt the other person too. It is a storm that your relationship and heart may not weather. And there’s nothing worst then realising that you now desert on a beach of misery. In friendship and in romance we must learn to forgive. We must learn to say “Yes, you hurt me. But I forgive you. It will be okay. I love you.” Even though we know we can be hurt again. I know this doesn’t apply for every situation. But trust your heart when you come to these points. These moments of pain. And it will let you know. When someone continually hurts you, it is okay to start asking questions and figure it out. And then decide, but still forgiving is powerful and it can help. And if you have to move on from that person then so be it.

I have to be honest, I am not really sure what I am getting at with this. But I just felt like talking about the hurt we have. If you don’t get anything else out of this just take this away. It is okay to be hurt. To feel that pain in your heart. We’re human it happens. Don’t hide from the world and life because of it. Because the fact you’re breathing means you have a chance to be hurt. Learn to be bold and to cope. And to deal with the hurt that is happening or in your life. No one is meant to spend a life in pain. It is not healthy for anyone.  I don’t know really what else to say at this point but I want to leave you with this. Learning to deal with the pain is important. And it part of practicing emotional hygiene.



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